She was beautiful
by itsscoop
Summary: I wasn't like a movie. It wasn't perfect. But we didn't need a movie, we needed each other...Reamy


Reagan POV

"Amy... stop"

"Did I do something wrong?"

"No... it's not you... I just... I can't."

She moved herself until she was in a sitting position on the bed. I looked at her. God she was beautiful. She was so beautiful. It really wasn't her or something she did, it was me... but she was beautiful. So beautiful. My beautiful Amy.

I remember the first time I saw her. The first thing that crossed my mind was that she was beautiful. We talked for hours. I don't know why I started talking to her in the first place. It usually requires a lot more than a pretty face to make me open up. I don't know why I did it.

I don't like sharing. I don't like bitching to people about my drama. Well to be honest secretly I wanted someone to understand me. I wanted someone who won't judge me no matter what I decide to share with them. I bet we all do.

I found myself talking to her. As I said it lasted for hours. It felt nice. So nice that I wondered if it was real. It was real. She was real.

I remember telling her how much I wanted to grow up. I wanted to depend only on myself. I didn't want to trust anybody. It was a trap. But I wanted to trust her.

I don't know when we became a thing. What's important is that we did. It was nice. Well not just nice. It felt right, it felt good, it felt like heaven. And I felt lucky.

I wanted to take things slow. I told her that I didn't want to scare her. The truth was that I was scared.

"Talk to me Rea. You've been doing that lately... you know kind of pulling away."

I wanted to tell her how scared I was. I really did. But I wasn't sure. Could I trust her with my heart? Probably not. I would have never known unless I tried.

"I'm not doing it on purpose... really... I'm just worried about stuff."

Was it too early to imagine a future with her. Perhaps it was but I couldn't blame myself for doing it. It felt too good. After all it was all a dream of course it would feel good.

"Do you want to tell me?" her voice was soft. It always was. I liked it.

I wanted to tell her. After a long pause I did. I told her how scared I was. I told her how I fell for this girl awhile ago. An amazing girl. She also did the amazing job of breaking my heart.

I remember telling her all my dreams and fears, all my desires. I also remember how she told me that I was just an experiment. How she wanted to end things before it was too late. Well it was already too late. For me at least.

Amy took my hand in hers. She understood that it was killing me to say this out loud. I realized that it was the first time I ever told anybody about it. It felt good. I felt grateful for having her. My beautiful Amy.

I told her so many things. It was really hard to me to talk to her. Mostly because I had only known her for a few months.

I had thought about meeting new people. However I had never thought about letting people in. It was hard. It was hard because I knew nothing about them and they knew nothing about me.

I knew nothing about Amy, she knew nothing about me.

Letting someone in was tough. Letting her in was tough. I had to start from scratch. I had to tell her everything. How am I supposed to trust a person I just met? She could have been a killer or perhaps she wanted to rob me. How could I know? I had to doubt her intentions. I had to but I didn't.

I knew she was good. She was perfect actually. I let her in. It was the smartest thing I have ever done.

"Now you see why I've been like this. I'm scared."

"Do you trust me?"

"Yeah, I do."

She kissed me slowly. She touched me softly. I was nervous. I had never had doubts about my body until then. How will she see me? Was I beautiful enough? Because she was. She was so damn beautiful.

I wasn't like a movie. It wasn't perfect. But we didn't need a movie, we needed each other.

I felt exhausted. I had been hours. We couldn't get enough. We were thirsty for each other.

I was surrounded by her. I was the little spoon. It was funny, I have always thought that I wasn't a cuddler but she made me feel like home. She made me feel safe.

She was putting soft kisses on my neck while she spoke

"Tell me something. Something that you haven't told anybody."

"I'm happy that _she _broke up with me. It helped me find you."

"She broke your heart though."

"For you it was so worth it."

I remember how happy we were.

I remember how I asked her to move in with me. I hoped that she would agree. My place wasn't a palace but it was cozy. It was our two years anniversary. We went on a date. Yeah even after two years I still enjoyed taking her out. I was 20 and she was 18. We were on a bench in a little park in the woods. It was dark. We had dinner. I was nervous.

"Hey are you okay?" she asked. Her voice was still soft. It always was.

"Yeah why?"

"Well your palm is a bit sweaty and you're spacing out."

"I just...how would you...it's just that...do you wanna move in with me?"

"Really?" she smiled widely. She was beautiful

"Yeah I figured that you're 18 now and your mom and Bruce won't mind."

"I can't wait!"

I remember how much time we spend unpacking. Her room seemed small but there were so many boxes. I honestly didn't recognize half of the stuff she brought. Eventually we unpacked. We were both a bit sweaty. We stood and admired our work. I wrapped my arms around her and she buried her face in my neck.

"Welcome home baby."

"You're my home Reagan." it warmed my heart.

I remember how nervous I was before I proposed to her. I had it all planned in my head. I had thought about the many different outcomes of this situation but I reassured myself that everything was going to be fine.

I wasn't a planner before I met her. I guess that changed.

I remember how we watched a movie. The couple was getting married. The guy proposed to the girl in front of the Eiffel Tower. Amy said that it was too cheesy and way too much cliche.

I also remember that a month later we watched another movie. A documentary about Tokyo. Amy said that Tokyo Tower looked beautiful during the night.

I remember working as much as I could. I had to save some money. Tokyo wasn't exactly close to Texas.

I told Amy that we were going on a trip. Her eyes were glowing. She was happy and so was I.

Everything went as planned. I took her to Tokyo Tower the second evening we arrived. I was afraid of heights but for her I was willing to do anything. She was overwhelmed with joy. 'It's now or never' I thought. I kneeled in front of her and pulled a small suede black box from my pocket. She knew what was coming.

"Amy Raudenfeld will you marry me?"

Her eyes were tearing. Mine were too. She didn't say anything, I don't think she was able to. She just nodded quickly pulling me into her arms. She hugged me tightly. It was hard for me to breathe. After a few seconds she pulled away a bit and kissed me. I could taste her tears and I could feel her smile. She was happy. She was beautiful.

I remember that we didn't talk about kids. It was a surprise to me when one day while we were cuddling she asked me if I wanted one. I had thought about it but I didn't know that she was ready. I wanted nothing more than to have a child with her.

We discussed it one day. She agreed to carry it. I secretly prayed for a girl.

I remember taking care of her. How moody she got while she was pregnant. She yelled at me for no reason. It was even kind of funny.

It was one day that we were going home after a few hours of shopping. She was in her second month. We were leaving the parking lot and the girl who controlled the barrier smiled to me and wished me a good day. Amy got so mad. She thought that the girl was seducing me. It was hilarious. She screamed at me while I was driving and when we got home the first thing she did was kissing my jawline and running her hands all over my body. I made a note in my head to make her jealous more often.

I remember how she made me go out in the middle of the night and buy her doughnuts. And every time I got back she had already changed her mind and wanted ice cream or pizza or chocolate.

I remember when she was in her eight month. She said that she was fat. She was convinced that I didn't want her anymore. If only she knew how much I loved her or how beautiful she was to me.

I remember the pain I felt while she was crushing my hand. Her contractions were getting more frequent. I heard her screams and then I heard my baby crying. It was a girl. She was so small. She had Amy's eyes. She was beautiful.

Farrah and Bruce were there. They were crying. I couldn't hold my tears too.

Her name was Jennifer.

I remember that Amy and I were very ashamed when she caught us having sex. We were so worked up. It had been a few days. Good thing Jennifer was only five. She didn't remember much.

I remember when I caught her smoking. She was 15. It wasn't my favourite thing but Amy and I handled it. I felt proud.

I remember coming home with Amy from work one day. We entered the living room tired after a long hours of working. We found Jennifer and some girl making out on the couch. I still don't know why but something in me snapped. I felt angry. We had a fight.

"JENNIFER?! What do you think you're doing?"

"Wow mom calm down."

We yelled at each other for a while even after the girl left.

"Great look what you did. She won't talk to me again after this."

"Well you probably should have considered making out somewhere more private."

"What do you know about being private?!"

"Excuse me?"

"Come on it's not like you and mom are being 'private' almost every night." Amy laughed at that. In a different situation I would have laughed too but I was too pissed.

"Huh funny. Go to your room."

"What? Seriously?"

"Yeah and you won't call that girl."

"Are you hearing yourself right now?"

"I am. And you're grounded... for a month."

"Reagan...-" Amy tried but with no luck

"No! She is. Go to your room! Now!"

"I hate you." Jennifer said with tears in her eyes

I remember feeling numb. My little girl, who was now apparently not so little, told me she hated me. I knew she didn't mean it but it still hurt. A few moments later I started having doubts if she really meant it or not.

I sat on the couch and buried my face in my hands. Why did I get so mad? She was a teenager of course she would want some alone time with her girl. I realized how stupid I was.

I felt a hand on my back. Rubbing small circles. I looked up at Amy, who offered me a small smile.

"She hates me."

"She doesn't. You know that. What I don't know is why did you snap like that? It was not that big of a deal."

"I don't know. I guess I just don't want her to get hurt. I don't know why I got so mad. God I'm so stupid." Amy hugged me tightly

"Go talk to her."

"I think she needs some time."

I remember having a rough week. Jennifer refused to talk to me. I went to her room.

"Hey."

"Hey."

She looked like she had been crying.

"Something wrong?"

"She broke up with me."

There was silence for about a minute.

"Do you want her back?"

"Hell yeah."

"Then what are you doing here. Get up and go talk to her."

"I'm scared"

"Of what?"

"That she might not want me back." she started crying "I... I love her mom. So much." I hugged her and she didn't pull away. She only cried harder.

"Then you should go and talk to her. Do you want me to give you a ride?"

"Yeah."

I drove for about ten minutes before I stopped in front of a small house.

"Will you stay here and wait for me?"

"Of course."

A few minutes later Jennifer walked out of the house with a big smile on her face. She wrapped her arms around my neck as soon as she entered the car.

"I didn't mean what I said the other day. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I wasn't right."

"You know you're my favourite person in the world right? You and mom." her words warmed my heart. My babygirl loved me.

I remember the joy I felt every day of my life. My family grew bigger. Amy and I were getting happier. Everything was perfect.

I remember how the days were passing by. One by one. We were getting older. It was a like a dream. An amazing dream. Our house was filled with laughter every weekend when our grandkids visited us.

I remember sitting on the porch with Amy. Our hair was grey but we were happy. She would feel conscious about her age now and then and I would assure her that she was still perfect to me. She was beautiful. My beautiful Amy.

Yeah it was a good life...

**Thanks for reading my other stories. It means a lot.  
Tumblr - itsscoop1 I follow back.  
Sam**


End file.
